says the parent in denial. by the way. since shes under 21. even a 0.01% is illegal considering SHES NOT OF LEGAL DRINKING AGE. jeez. im only 19 and i knew that....

Listen, (and I mean this sincerely) you are not helping your daughter (and she clearly needs help), by being in denial. As Stephen pointed out above, any alcohol in her system is illegal since she is underage. And even if the marijuana was someone else's, aren't you concerned about who she is hanging around with that would have it in their possession while with your daughter?

There is nothing ok about this - and in fact it could be a step in a downward spiral for your daughter. Do her a favor - take this very seriously! Talk to her, get her some counseling, whatever - but do not be in denial!

Vikes12 - I am sorry you are obviously going through some tough times - I hear your anger and frustration. But the fact is that not every kid is smoking and drinking, and the ones that are could very well be headed for trouble. And these kids (I hope you are not one) are hurting themselves and each other not to mention their future (hopefully they will have one).
Parents who deny what is happening are not helping their kids. NO parent wants to believe that their kids are capable of this type of behavior, but burying one's head in the sand won't help.
I wish you well Vikes12, and I really hope that you figure out a way to deal with your hurt and anger in a way that does not involve drugs or alcohol. There are lots of groups and counselors out there that can help - don't be afraid to ask!
Good Luck!

Just bring your checkbook with you to court Holman and everything will be alright. Thats how the parents in Kinnelon get there kids out of trouble and by the time they go to college they are strung out on heroin because their parents keep making up excuses for their kids.

Lynn I am sorry but I think you should know someone before you comment about their life from a small article on the Internet. You don't know this girl and your really don't know what's going on in her head. Just because she drinks doesn't make her a bad person, for if you can remember the drinking age at one point was 18 not 21. Also if you look at the facts you could probably assume that she drank the night before and took the responsible thing of not drinking and driving then. She most likely woke up and unknowingly still had some in here system. I for one think that if that is the case that she showed that she is responsible enough to drink. I wish her and her family the best of luck. This will be hard at first but you will find in the long run you and your daughter will be closer to each other and time will heal all. Good luck.

Lynn your theories of people going in a downward spiral are false. Students who drink every weekend do not make them "bad seeds" and will never accomplish anything. All of my friends who drink received scholarships to the colleges they plan to attend. You just do not look at the bigger picture, which is that every high school teen is drinking almost every weekend and some are in fact smoking marijuana too.

So osenni your saying that you never drank/smoked in highschool? and if you did how are you doing at the moment are you in a downward Spiral towards heavy drug use as Lynn suggests? Weed is not a gate way drug as many ppl think it is. Sure ppl that use hard drugs might have started with weed, but that doesn't mean that everyone who smokes is going to end up doing hard drugs. That's like saying anyone that drives is going to end up becoming a race cardriver. Just bc it's a common starting point for ppl doesn't mean that everyone is going to end up at the same place.

I don't quite understand why the majority of people commenting keep referencing high school when she is clearly in college...long story short is not only do I attend college with this girl, but can personally vouch for her in regards to not having a drug addiction problem whatsoever. This coming from someone who chooses to steer away from drugs altogether. As far as drinking goes, blowing a .01 in the morning is illegal for anyone underage, yes, but as was previously pointed out, nobody seems to be accentuating the fact that this girl was trying to do the responsible thing by not drinking and driving the previous night. I understand that the law is the law, but really people...when will you stop beating the metaphorical dead horse? Can all of you honestly say you have never broken the law to some extent, whether caught or not? Let it be.

One last note, i think this is super creepy how something along these lines gets posted online for everyone in the county to see. What ever happened to some privacy?

Agreed with Duke. She was clearly being more responsible then people think by driving home the next morning and clearly she was not drunk. She's in college and is home for the summer, what do you expect?! The weed is a different story but the drinking is not that big of a deal. Many teens do it, not to mention she is a college student, NOT in the high school. Everyone knows that the college environment is filled with partying. And agreed with the privacy thing. Our world is pathetic with the lack of privacy we have.

were living in a country that is borderline condoning drugs and alcohol as long as they do it"safely and responsibly. this is very sad. there is not a single good thing to come from any liquor or drug. " if your not 21. you shouldnt be drinking. PERIOD.

Robyn - I can see where you may be a little confused by some of my comments because I see now that the posters to whom I was responding have since deleted their posts so mine may seem out of context now.

I will tell you that while I am not a Kinnelon resident, I do work with many young adults in the area as well as with their parents. Unfortunately, as you will note from my earlier posts, I have a lot of experience dealing with adolecsent drug and alcohol use, both personally and professionally. As you probably know, many drug and alcohol abuse counselors go into the field because of personal experiences. I am no different - I had a very close cousin (almost like a sister, really) die in high school due to an alcohol-related event. My aunt and uncle were devasted, of course, but what I remember, and what I continue to see very consistently today, are the parents who cannot or will not accept the fact that their kids may be involved with drugs/alcohol and display at-risk behavior. Denying the facts or the behavior means that we can't get these kids the help they need. It's obviously a subject that I am very passionate about, and clearly others posting here are as well.

I do have children - both adults with young families of their own - who seem to be happy and healthy.

I wish the same for all of you.

Lynn - I understand that as a drug counselor you may identify Sarah's behavior as one leading to some downhill drug spiral. However, you do not know the facts. She blew a .01. She is a 19 year old college student. What many parents today seem to forget is that when they were young, the drinking age was 18 (as it is in most other countries) and I'm sure many of them drank or even (god forbid) smoked weed (which is also legal in some places and I personally know is still used by many Kinnelon parents) when they were in college. Drinking itself is not a sin, and Sarah was obviously being a responsible drinker by sleeping over that night rather than driving. I'm not saying she should be exempt from the law for these reasons but I think it is completely unnecessary for anyone to critique her mother on her parenting skills or warn her that she may spiral out of control and become a heroin addict. I have been friends with Sarah for 9 years and I can assure you that she is a motivated student and is not a rampant drug user. She is a normal college student who once in a while drinks alcohol and who may know people who smoke weed. To sum it up, don't pass judgment without knowing what you are talking about. Honestly, this town has way too many mothers with nothing better to do than ignorantly gossip about other people's children.
Also Mike Osenni.... I find your comment a little hypocritical. Did you (or your brother) not drink and smoke your freshman year of college?